Hey Dolls,
So I know it’s been a hot minute since I posted on here! I’ve had so many post ideas but I’ve been finding it hard to finish them. I won’t bore you with the details but hopefully I should be wrapping up the Relationship Series with the last in its series soon and move on to the next project.
Anyhow, enough of that! I am here to talk about the craziness that is Tinder and how it has these dudes out here cheating like there’s no tomorrow.
I heard about this rumour some time ago but thought nothing of it because I felt like Tinder or no Tinder, a guy is going to cheat if he wants to cheat – regardless. HOWEVER, I have been having some very interesting conversations with my cousin lately and it has come to my attention just how cray the cheating situation is on Tinder.
According to my cousin (who is male), Tinder is the cheating man’s shopping mall. They get to pick their poison and add it to the cart that is WhatsApp. We all know variety, when it comes to men, ceases to be the spice of life but the poisonous fruit that ultimately leads them to their downfall.
Tall, short, curvy, thin, blonde, red head, pink, blue, alien – you name it, it exists on Tinder. So when you, being the loving girlfriend you are (or at least try to be and think you are) accidentally forget to stroke that ever so slightly time consuming nonsense thing they call an ego, off to the shopping mall they go. At first it may just be a low self-esteem thing and they want to see if they still ‘got it like that’ but most times, this shit can lead to a fall blown sextation and affair!
There are actually many statistics (on the web) that show what percentage of guys go on these online dating sites to specifically cheat on their spouse. Unfortunately, as insane as the numbers look, we have to multiply it by 10 because we know that some sneaky fuckers out there did not bother telling the truth.
Now, back to my douchebag of a cousin. Guess what he said his reason for cheating on his girlfriend of three years was? – “because I can”… Yes boys and girls. He cheats because he can. Now, isn’t that some next level type of bullshit? He cheats because he can. That simple? So essentially, you can do all you want and do not want for and to your partner, but if he wants to cheat, he will. And now, thanks to sites like Tinder, there is a plethora of females out there that he can browse and that can be delivered to his door step, just a click and a wink away.
Instantly, being the crazy modern female I have embraced to be, I started checking out the guy I have been talking to – legit taking this situation and revelation out on him. Why? – Because he is a Goddamn guy thats why! – What are the chances this dude has been pulling and continues to pull the same level of shit with me? All I can do is believe what he is telling me right? With all the levels of stalker-bitching that can be reached, we, you, I will never truly know? So – is that where trust comes in? But how can we, you, I trust someone we do not even know? Is dating in the 21st century a path to damnation? I mean even when you get in a relationship, there’s a chance the guy may still choose to play the field anyway… pffft… is it too late to join the nunnery??
xoxo
Bastards are gonna be bastards. Betrayal of the established relationship parameters is a bastard move. Standard societal boyfriend/girlfriend includes exclusivity. If someone feels they can’t do that then speak up, better to understand from the outset than to have it sneak up. But perhaps that’s the problem, the general maturity level of most guys and many women is stuck at a late teenager level.
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This is so true!
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Yep, pure BS. Life is too short. Just leave her alone so she can be happy with someone else if you can’t be faithful.
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Pffft! It really should be that simple!
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This is such a worry of mine – from both parts – I’m on Tinder and to think that I could be speaking to a guy that is shacked up with someone else!? Ergh, it knocks me sick.
And from the other side, when I eventually do get into a relationship – trust is a dangerous but equally rewarding thing. I have so many guy friends that are the loveliest people you will ever meet but have cheated on their girlfriends/wives countless times. Makes me think anyone is capable of it!
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I know right! It’s so worrying because literally anyone is capable of playing the field.. I suppose it comes down to trust but it is all a bit disheartening to try.
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They really do!! I slept with a guy on Tinder, and later found out from someone (who happened to know him) that he’s married! -He was allegedly in the beginnings of a divorce, but who the fuck knows if that was the truth.
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Urgh! I’m sorry that happened! These apps were designed to help people find love or at the very least a really good hook up! I don’t really want to be the girl who helps a guy cheat.. I’m so over Tinder.. I think its the worst of the bunch when it comes to encouraging people to cheat on their spouse.
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I agree! It’s so shady. I actually just wrote about a guy I met on Tinder. It wasn’t a horrible experience, but it also wasn’t one I took seriously.
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Oooh I’ll read it in a bit xo
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Fantastic article and wonderful critique of a serious contemporary issue, Nazamwasi. I’m happy that I never got into Tinder. I look at my friends who are hooked on it and they remind me of cocaine addicts; they don’t seem to know how to stop. They can never appreciate their time with any one woman because they’re already flicking through Tinder for the next. As a result, they’ve got tons of multiplicity in their lives, but very little depth. Intimacy is an adventure into vulnerability; Tinder’s promise of fast food sex is a way of *avoiding* vulnerability by keeping things as superficial as possible. The sexual variety and thrill-seeking is so enticing and fast-paced–like flickering pornographic images on a late night screen that fuels yet another addiction to blur into the first–that the emotional emptiness of the lifestyle Tinder can engender may not even be noticed for months at a time…
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Wow thank you for your kind words! I completely agree; Tinder can be very addictive. It gets to a point that it becomes more of game, swiping to left and right as opposed to actually wanting to meet someone you could potentially date. Thank you for reading and commenting! Your comment literally made my day! xo
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My daughter was in a “committed” relationship with a man – house, cars, baby – for seven years, when she found he had a second phone and hundreds of names of hook-ups, plus video. He told her that it was just so easy, he couldn’t help himself. Sickening. Thanks for writing about this.
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Aww I’m sorry to hear that! It really is sickening. And the excuse is really not even an excuse! Thank you for reading 🙂 xo
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I actually want to die! That is so depressing. That said, I love your style and please keep us (me) informed of the dark devious pitfalls that come with surviving on this planet!
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Haha, yeah reading it back I can see just how depressing it is! Unfortunately, there are no rules to follow when dating – everything goes. We are all doomed haha
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Hahahaha!! Not doomed by any means, but in the words of the great philosopher Rihanna, we gotta make those boys “work work work work” 😉
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😂😂 Ah yes! I often forget about her famous work and philosophy! Thank you for the reminder 😊
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The thirst on Tinder is real!!! I have seen no less than THREE guys I know who are very much married on there! Like, why? What are you doing on Tinder when you’re married? But what I’ve gathered on Tinder is that it is NOT a dating site. It’s a hook-up site. Don’t use it if you’re looking for something more.
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Mate, Tinder is just full of shit.. but, every now and again you get a gem.. It’s just up to you whether or not you can be bothered to stay on the prowl 😉 xo
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